Ask a Question #1 – Is it possible to love the unloved?

Thanks for the question.

Here’s my initial answer — I don’t know that I’ve ever met somebody who is entirely unloved. But let’s say I am wrong and that somewhere in the world there is one person who is entirely unloved. And let’s say that I was sent to investigate this person to find out if it is possible to love them. I’d have a few questions.

  • How are we defining love?
  • Are we speaking of romantic love? Of Eros? Agape? How wide of a net are we casting into the world?
  • Have they ever been in the presence of another human?
  • Were they not born into the world?
  • How specifically must they be the focus of the love?

The broader the definition of love I believe I can declare with certainty that there is no such person who may find themselves unloved. I have felt at varying times with varying strengths a general love for mankind. In those moments, I do not carve out any exceptions. If I feel love in my heart for all living things and I know that there are others well above me who have loved deeper and more constantly then I can rest assured that nobody is unlovable.

That said, I suppose it’s possible that some people currently feel unloved (perhaps not loved in the specific manner in which they hoped to be loved) because of circumstances beyond their control or because of mistakes made within their control–they are loved from afar and the possibility for them to be loved in the specific manner they crave exists as long as there are humans on the planet.

I will concede, regretfully, that some people make it difficult to love them through the depravity of their actions or the wanton disregard of their words, but we know they were once a baby and that they will also have a chance at some unknown date in the future to renounce their past and be the light they’d always wanted to be. But because they were almost once surely loved as an infant, even if by some distant grandmother removed from the domestic fray or because they might one day repent they prove to be lovable.

To assure nobody goes unloved be sure to send your highest regards to the world tonight.

Commit Active Mercy,


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